The Most Powerful Invention in 40 Years...the cell phone

One of the most polarizing objects in the world today is the cell phone.  I can’t think of any device in my lifetime that has had more of an impact than a cell phone.  And I don’t make this statement lightly. In my lifetime we have seen some major medical advances, the continued evolution of the personal computer, the development of electric automobiles, and much more. Now all of these things have had significant impacts on the world but I still believe the cell phone has shaped the world more than we truly want to admit.

 Let’s use the last presidential election as example.  We have the famous image of Hillary Clinton staring at her cell phone most likely looking at one of those 33,000 deleted emails.  We had then candidate Donald Trump tweeting on a regular basis from what one could probably guess was a cell phone.  Millions of Americans openly admitted to receiving their “news” from either social media sites or broadcast news networks while staring at their cell phone.  I have heard the words Russia and Collusion more in the last two years than I had in my previous 38 years combined – all thanks to a cell phone.

 Need more proof? How many relationships do you that have ended AND begun thanks to a cell phone and the instant access to social media?  We are quick to blame social media for these issues but it takes a vehicle to deliver those messages and often that vehicle is a cell phone.  The biggest way to prove your trust to a mate today is by giving them your passcode! I shit you not. That is essentially like pulling yourself off the market.

 People are often concerned about “Big Brother” today and the all too scary implant but most Americans keep that implant by their side every second of the day and it’s called a cell phone.  A potential answer to this is that people will often say “just turn it off” but we can’t do that. Have you ever seen a person when their cell phone gets down to 10% battery life, they will provide sexual favors for a quick charge.  A phrase uttered today more than ever before in the history of the universe is “What percent are you at?”

 How many parents discipline their children by grounding them from their cell phone?  “You can take the car, you can take the television, you can take the Xbox but please dad don’t take my cell phone!!”

 The cell phone is such a big deal when Apple releases a new phone it makes the world news. Within minutes the world knows how much it costs, the size of the screen, and how amazing the camera is for filtering out all the bad shit that your genetics gave you.

 There are stores in malls who make large profits selling just accessories for cell phones.  You can’t find toy stores in the mall anymore but I can buy a case for my $1,000 phone with any Disney Character on it in a matter of seconds! 

 I have a simple test. Ask an any person above the age of 13 if they could provide World Peace immediately but it would mean they would be the one person in the world without a cell phone and if they give you a true answer MANY would say “Let the bombs fly, how do you expect me to watch Netflix at my kids soccer game?”

 I could go on and on but my battery is low and I have to find a plug in IMMEDIATELY!!  I have candy that needs crushing!